just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
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you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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