windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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