Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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