ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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