i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
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Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
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Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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