playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
