I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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