ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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