Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
