OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
