Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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