I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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