This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize