That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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