I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize