and you said cock pushups were impossible
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
