I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
