whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize