Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
