Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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