ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize