We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
