The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
