you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
