I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
