ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
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i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
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mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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