im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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