Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
