So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
