theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
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But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
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What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize