He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
