playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
