that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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