I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
