do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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