Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Thats gay

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  (313): So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic (1-313): so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation? (313): Thats gay http://tfl.nu/2245
  Replies (2) Good night (1191) Bad night (402)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.

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  (508): my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter. http://tfl.nu/lkrq
  Replies (14) Good night (469) Bad night (3097) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.

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  (818): My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert. http://tfl.nu/ehir
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel

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  (215): she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel http://tfl.nu/yxdc
  Replies (16) Good night (463) Bad night (3947) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.

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  (717): So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia. http://tfl.nu/uo67
  Replies (46) Good night (2253) Bad night (3280)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.

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  (503): I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much. http://tfl.nu/97de
  Replies (22) Good night (3945) Bad night (675)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year

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  (517): this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year http://tfl.nu/tikr
  Replies (19) Good night (8406) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.

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  (218): I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care. http://tfl.nu/yew2
  Replies (12) Good night (974) Bad night (4687) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.

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  (216): I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance. http://tfl.nu/bz9b
  Replies (14) Good night (1207) Bad night (4136) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him

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  (614): Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him http://tfl.nu/w6qf
  Replies (19) Good night (5065) Bad night (1008) Order T-Shirt
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  (445): View more from Pennsylvania

  My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.

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  (445): My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment. http://tfl.nu/kvle
  Replies (5) Good night (1414) Bad night (716)
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  (909): View more from California

  It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?

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  (909): It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it? http://tfl.nu/yjug
  Replies (8) Good night (1771) Bad night (569) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.

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  (570): Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer. http://tfl.nu/iju5
  Replies (12) Good night (1525) Bad night (1105)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight

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  (616): Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight http://tfl.nu/1hmk
  Replies (3) Good night (838) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever

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  (303): When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever http://tfl.nu/l7j2
  Replies (3) Good night (848) Bad night (433)

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