i just google imaged poop.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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