oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
