Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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