How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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