Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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