i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I would fuck him just for his dog
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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