if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
