Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
