yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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