Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize