I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
