Where did you get a picture of my penis
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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