you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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