Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
